Graham Fisher

[RobertSWade]

I have just learned that fellow Rager Graham Fisher has died in hospital. The family has no details.

[Rondo]

you mean cripster???;( very sorry to hear this.......

[BushcraftOnFire]

Our prayers to the family.. may Graham rest in peace

[D Akey]

Another one from the long ago here in the AR forums. The man had a very hard road and it was a real chore to make art -- But he did. I think he really embraced what technology gave to people with physical challenges, especially for him and those of like kind who were so extremely challenged. I'm so sorry to hear of his passing.

As I recall from his postings back then, he worked very hard with tremendous spirit at teaching kids who were crippled like him to get into using computers. AR was one of those things that made it fun and thus a friendly endeavor. In that way he was a role model for them, I've gathered. Not so long ago I did see him posting in the beta testing forums here before the last update, and I was heartened to see him still going at it in high form.

I got he was in there giving life his all. And I wondered if his all was what was inviting those kids to a far more dynamic life -- seeing somebody doing it (and helping them along as well).

Sometimes, when you witness someone who reach out in generosity through the murk, you might wonder if they're not given challenges so as to be able to come in at a heightened level of empathy. I think he was one of those special people who gave so much, just by being himself, and rising beyond the physical limitations.

I remember photos in the forums of himself and his computer rig. He was severely handicapped and it was a real challenge at one point to find a way to make a mark at all, let alone a precise one. The computer and AR allowed him into the world in many ways. Like the 6 million dollar man, he quipped. Phew. . . Respect, Graham. Cripster!!! Go man go!!!!!!!!!!! I missed you back then when you went on to other things, and now, sadly, I get to miss you all over again. God bless and RIP!

<Sigh>

Thanks Robert.

[Enug]

Sad to hear of this. I think you are right DA - often those most challenged seem to show the most strength of character and just get on with it instead of sitting there moaning. Something has been taken from them but they find a way to make the most of what they have. I'd like to think of him now with his health restored enjoying his reward.

[Fashmir]

I was talking with Graham back at the end of July. His computer was dying and he was feeling extremely low. I feel awful. I encouraged him to hang on and we would figure something out. In the course of events I became extremely busy through August, 12 and 16 hour days and the like. I let the conversation slip into silence and now I feel a bit numb about things. I don't know what took him, but I do know that he was in a very dark place. I have learned something from this. Something has come to full clarity. When you have an impulse to help someone, don't try to do it alone. If you have an impulse to call on a community to help, do it. It is TOGETHER that we accomplish the more worthwhile things in life. Were I in a position to do it, I would call for a Graham Fisher Foundation to help disabled and underprivileged people get the art therapy/community that ArtRage is so good at being.

[D Akey]

Complex issue, Fashmir. Communities are made up of people with people's limitations and choices. There have been attempts at a global art community here on and off and it happened so long as people wanted it and fed it. As time passed, and as happens so often in life, most left to do things that were more in line with where they wanted to put their limited energies, including Cripster.

Sounds like he kept in touch with you, to your credit. But like they say, we take care of ourselves so that we can take care of others and give of our overflow. If we need to take care of ourselves, it's what we need to do, except in the most dire circumstances, the extremity of which is not always apparent, so how could anyone know.

Regarding that last contact with you, if I may comment, you probably had no way of knowing he was leaving. And it also sounds like he had no way of telling you, perhaps to spare you from getting pulled under, perhaps because he was psychologically worn down after a lifetime of uphill struggle. Maybe he was that ill and didn't want to fixate on it. Geography was a real hindrance to what you could do for him. He lived on the other side of the planet and unless he told you something and kept you updated, there was no way for you to know more. Hopefully he had something there in New Zealand (?) to sustain him in so far as was possible.

My last PM to him a couple years ago (I think) I asked how his wife was, just to kick start an old conversation on what I hoped would be a happy note. Back in the day, he would briefly mention her and their dog and his project with the school kids. And I know it was not easy to type, or even use voice recognition. So I tried to minimize the amount of stuff I would ask.

But this last time, he told me that she had passed away, and knowing how society in general tends to pull away from handicapped people, I projected into it a really strong pang of a gaping emptiness. It was painful to read. I offered my condolences in a reply PM. He did not try to contact me again. I had no idea what his circumstances had become, but I was waiting for him to take the lead and put the conversation back on track. He didn't. I honored that, and to myself hoped he was finding better conversations and things to pass his time somewhere.

My philosophy is that we participate at whatever level is open to us, and being online with people strewn throughout the globe, it's not like you can go knocking on someone's door to watch a game or fix their computer or whatever. Heck, I don't even have that here locally except for family.

When my son was in high school there was all kinds of social stuff going on for me. And when his class graduated, the natural connections with other parents started fading as all the kids went to meet their diverse futures. We need something vital in common to let relationships grow. And it takes both parties reaching toward each other or at least toward the same thing.

I'm projecting onto you what anyone with a human heart would feel, that is a certain regret for not having done more, in your case as recent as July. Forgive me if I'm missing the boat and butting in -- again. But, process that however you will, and hopefully you will see there may have been nothing more you could have done with what you knew. That is a possibility. And sometimes behaving normally, with the highs and lows of our own head spaces offers others the opportunity to also interact freely and openly. And in my experience, handicapped people often prefer that to being coddled. Respect for them to be self-directing is a right to be honored, regardless of our natural instinct to help or do for them.

It's to your credit that it bugs you as does much of his circumstances. But some things are above our pay grade. Consider this: your being there with him even in silence may have been a blessing to him. There's a whole lot that can be communicated without words. And his experience was his to participate in at whatever level he brought to it. Again, in my parlance, I say God Bless him.

[Fashmir]

Thank you D Akey. Truly.

[hildee]

I understand where you're coming from, David. Our neighbour across the road died a few weeks ago, at 67. The day before I called across the road "Are you ok, Gary?", just in the friendly way we always communicated. He called out yes. The next morning very early I heard his dog barking like crazy, opened my curtains from my bed and saw an ambulance; then a cop car pulled up, then the funeral people. He had died during the night. So sad, and to think I was the last person out and about to talk to him. It had happened this way many a time - just a little chat here and there, as well as visits. But what a shock to know he's gone for good.

Life goes on from day to day, we never know when we will see any of our friends / loved ones for the last time. We can only do our best and also live our lives as best we can.

I remember cripster. Always sad when someone is no longer around a forum.

[Caesar]

I remember of Cripster and of is unequivocal avatar, but mainly of his enthusiastic approach to art and to teach painting and drawing to kids.
I had unfortunately too rare interactions, but I got a very good impression of his personality, so I'm sad of this early epilogue of his life which is a tremendous loss of a veteran and wiseman in our Artrage "family".
I'll pray for his soul and hope he will have a special treatment in Heaven, also considering the physical situation he courageously and fruitfully faced and stood to teach so much about life we too often disregard or give for granted, claiming any kind of right from what ultimately is a mistery and a time-limited game, where we only have to play well, with style and a grateful attitude for picking any opportunity of happiness and the joy to be generous with our love and concrete care for who's around us and for other people. I strongly suspect he enjoyed all this, thus anything around him. REQUIESCAT IN PACE.