ArtRage 5 Product PageArtRage Lite Product PageArtRage for iOS Product PageArtRage for Android Product PageArtRage  Android Oil Painter Free Product PageArtRage  Free Demos Page

Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: painting pictures with words

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Reno Nevada
    Posts
    768

    painting pictures with words

    A short story I wrote. I would love some comments: I really tried to paint this memory with words. I call it:

    "The Old Steel Bridge"

    I miss days like this…

    It was a late summer afternoon. I can remember walking down that gravel road back to my home. I had been fishing down at the old steel bridge that day. I had just stopped at the artesian well on Old man Evan East, property. Ignoring the “No Trespassing Sign” and the fact that we all knew “old man East” would sometimes come busting out of his front door waving his shot gun, yelling, “You good for nothins” even firing a round or two just over our heads to scare us off his property. Knowingly with a bit of respect and an ounce of adolescent fear, I still drank my fill of the deep wells ice cold water. All the while, with one eye on my escape route and one on Mr. East’s house, just down the road. I brushed the sweat from my forehead and then squeezed back through the falling down wooden gate there at the corner and made my way towards home.
    The willows that lined the gentle bend of the creek that also followed the road, rustled in the warm Indiana afternoon breeze and their limbs brushed along the road side, like a broom dusting my path as I walked. I looked down as my feet shuffled through the gravel, my eyes always looking for that fossil or amazing stone to add to my collection.
    My life and my mind were simple then.
    I was a lucky boy living outside the city life. The country side is filled with so many different things to excite young senses. From the trees came the vibrating rhythmic beat of the invisible cicada’s song. It would rise and fall as it filled my ears. The flying grasshoppers chirped and rattled about in the tall grasses and wild Jasmine that also grew there. The smell of fresh cut hay laid slightly upon the early evening, as well the aroma of the corn fields that had been heated by the day.
    I remember as if it were yesterday. I kicked the rocks as I walked along, I can still taste the gravel dust. I stopped and turned to look up and watch a red winged black bird as it cawed, while flying above the corn rows in the field next to me. Then I turned back to continue upon my way. To my surprise, I looked straight up into the dark hazel eyes of this huge white tail deer. Looking into the wide frozen gaze of this massive animal scared me ... I froze and he froze. It was as if time stood still. I believe I could even feel his heart beat while I felt my heart rise into my throat, my chest tightened I couldn't breathe or even break the riveted stare. I can remember that feeling of rigid fright. Then I saw the deer’s nose twitch…he snorted and with a grunt he jumped an unbelievable distance across the road and over the small ditch and the broken wire fence next to the corn field. He disappeared into the thousand corn leaves. Like an actor at the end of a play, he took a final bow and in a wisp, as if the curtain briefly parted, he disappeared behind it. The road fell silent as if he’d never been there. Still in a bit of a daze, I shook my head, I realized I was sitting in the middle of the road … I grabbed my cane pole and my spilled coffee can of worms. Jumping up I ran the rest of the way home. Excited to share a new a tale, one of many that filled my evenings and those funny shared stories at the super table. Including a special place in my thoughts forever.




    It's just one of those moments one never forgets. A story I've shared over our thanksgiving table so I thought I'd share this with my friends here. Happy thanksgiving everyone!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    22,517
    Great story. I was right there with you. Especially real was the bit about being riveted still, feeling it's heart beat and yours. I've gotten a very clear experience from that because you got the real tactile essence of the moment, the building of tension. And then the leap. I honestly felt the power of the deer's body.

    It really speaks about just how close we once were with nature. Maybe some lucky folks still are. But I wonder how many such experiences are going the way of the old pre-genetic engineering fruits and vegetables in which the flavors are lessened in favor of a long shelf life.

    When you bring this story to the Thanksgiving table, as you do, you are bringing a grand old flavor to share. And therein is what is often at the heart of your paintings as for example with that one of the cowboy and the horse. You seem to go after the whole experience - describing that moment that says it all. It feels like you are after an idealized tableau, but the fact is that those moments exist. And I can definitely feel the heart beat in them.

    Thanks for the story, my friend. May your Thanksgiving be ideal.
    "Not a bit is wasted and the best is yet to come. . ." -- remembered from a dream

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Reno Nevada
    Posts
    768
    Thank you for your rich and endearing reply. I'm glad it captured your mind and gave you that closeness to the elements of my memory and story. This is one of my short stories I've written for a book I hope to self publish one day. titled ("A Piece of my Mind")
    I too wonder the same, if my children will ever know the things I totally took for granted in my younger years. I'm glad I had an artistic and open mind back then so i could absorb life and retell it now. I want my children to not only understand their father but some how experience my past and grow with me through my stories.
    I'm finding that writing is also a art that I enjoy as well.

    I too hope all of you and you and your family have a wonderful thanks giving.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Huntsville, On., Canada
    Posts
    5,356
    Cartuneman, I enjoyed your story and can really relate to the feeling as I also came nose to nose with a deer when I was walking in the woods near my home, we both stopped stared and then he took of with a wonderful leap over the edge of the river embankment and was gone while I was still standing there holding my breath

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Reno Nevada
    Posts
    768
    hahahaha Jean. it is a feeling and an experience one just never forgets isn't it?! glad you liked my story.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •