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Zephon
03-10-2008, 05:41 AM
In my opinion this work is too advanced now to be posted in the "work in progress" section, but I'm pretty sure I'll still retouch it...

If you have suggestion to make this painting better, please let me know. If you notice obvious mistakes (proportions), let me know too :P

Zephon
03-10-2008, 11:28 AM
also any comment may be appreciated ;)

RobertSWade
03-10-2008, 12:02 PM
Looks finished to me. It speaks to me from half a century past. :)

Caesar
03-10-2008, 09:18 PM
It's very well done and "fresh" and I wouldn't overwork on it since there's an overall balance thus it seems finished. :D :D 8)
If anything should be said, my personal sudden impressions is that the promontory behind appears too neatly contoured, in particular in its separation from the sea and it seems a bit superimposed.

Caesar
03-10-2008, 09:18 PM
It's very well done and "fresh" and I wouldn't overwork on it since there's an overall balance thus it seems finished. :D :D 8)
If anything should be said, my personal sudden impressions is that the promontory behind appears too neatly contoured, in particular in its separation from the sea and it seems a bit superimposed.

screenpainter
03-10-2008, 09:28 PM
Stunning and gorgeous just as it is. Beautiful work. :D

D Akey
03-10-2008, 09:44 PM
I would have to say that the finish isn't the part that catches my attention. I would say it was the pose being ambiguous, particularly around the cocked leg. My mind can figure it out, but I don't want to have to rationalize it.

To me the lower leg mysteriously begins up around her hip and comes down at a diagonal, without connection to the body. I would suggest making the connection to the body (i.e. it would be well to indicate the thigh). And when it gets to the ankle, I would change the plane of the foot to show that it's not just more leg.

When you are posing a model. or picking a photo for reference, you want to look for things like this, so that you can avoid particularly ambiguous bits.

Show off the form in a way that shows off the form. Think dancers and their poses. They design poses for beauty or expression, and they don't make the poses optical illusions unless they are doing a dance about optical illusions.

You have a lot going for you. You have a good eye. Just that when you were looking at this photo reference, you were probably looking at it for the head and attitude primarily. And you weren't looking for problems. But that happens sometimes. You're not alone in that.

Zephon
03-11-2008, 12:11 PM
Thank you all. Glad to see you're seeing mistakes I didn't notice...

Especially thank to D Akey. I've started with a photo for reference, but the result is finally very different from the photo (be sure, the model is far more gorgeous on the photo). I've changed the pose of the model a little bite, but it has induce some problems...

I'm working at retouching my painting now :P (I don't forget the promontory...)

stinkyu111
03-11-2008, 01:56 PM
i hope i'm not to bold to say this ...it's the photographer coming out

on the painting it's great, strong colour

a note about composition, try not to get to centered ( the subject splits the image in almost two equal parts.

i've posted 2 idea's about different layouts of the image

1. focus on the subject more ( the girl ) a vertical image

2. is using more of the surrounding background, keeping the left side so the viewer is visually sent back into the image with a "psychological line"

it is all up to the artist what to use, add or subtract to the image.

i hope you don't mind my editing your image to show you what i mean.

Steve

Zephon
03-11-2008, 10:12 PM
i hope you don't mind my editing your image to show you what i mean.

no problem Steve! People may even retouch them to show me their idea : I would be pleased :)

'Zephon 2' looks actually better : thank you a lot :)
I'm not a good photographer but I understand (and appreciate) your improvement.

stinkyu111
03-12-2008, 10:16 AM
seeing the world through the lens was hard to take at first ( in highschool )

i only had 1 lens ( normal 50 mm on a old 35mm camera ) it can be very restricting, but later i got zoom lens and i had more flixablity in how much you can include in the scene ( photography )

but with that restrictive frame of the camera you start to learn that not everything is needed in the image to make it great.

i recommend that all artist of any medium to buy ( even a cheap camera )

camera can not only help with learning to deal with the image frame( say a canvas. )

but also seeing different angles of the world ( looking up or down on the world ) close up and far away.

also seeing light in a more restricted way ( the camera exposure ) is not as senitive to light as the human eye is ...not everything is seen when you take a picture , especially in extreme lighting situation, dawn or dusk, or night time with flash.

anyways i'm rambling on,

good luck

Steve

pai
03-13-2008, 12:24 PM
I like it. Very nice painting. :)